Megan and I attended our friend’s wedding in Vegas today. It was the most unique wedding I’ve been to – aboard the pirate ship at Treasure Island Casino. Complete with a pirate swinging in to bring them the rings. Tons of fun. Weddings are really extensions of the couple you’ve been and the couple you will become. I think, at least for Megan and I, that a wedding should exhibit the personalities of the bride and groom. It’s why I hate bridezillas and over indulgent mother-in-laws. (Linda, you are not in that category.) When a parent or a bride becomes a control freak,. exerting their power over how the wedding will look and feel, it no longer is a wedding and its more of a one way mirror for the power hungry brat. The wedding, in those cases, reflects nothing of the joining of two people. It’s sad.
When I visited Omaha last year to do some of the planning, I met a woman at my mom’s shop who told me, in so many words, that the groom’s job was to nod and say yes. She went on to tell me how mad she was at her son-in-law because he wanted a say in everything. Well he should – in my opinion – because it’s his wedding too. That lady was a b-i-t-c-h. Sorry, lady – you were and probably are. Megan and I planned our wedding together and made sure every detail was something we both wanted. It was a collaboration to celebrate a collaboration. Save the bridezilla shit for your birthday.
Natalie and Derek’s wedding was clearly a celebration of them as a unit. It was not a platform for Natalie or Derek or Derek’s mom or Natalie’s mom or a wedding planner. All I could think of is how lucky Megan and I were to have parents who let us take the ball and create the wedding WE wanted. Derek and Natalie must have had that same luck, because, really, it was all them. From the pirate ship to the table names (all names of things they both love – Coke-a-Cola, Harry Potter, Second City, etc) to the music. What a great time.
When the night was over, I asked Megan is she had fun and she looked a little sad. She wasn’t, though. She was contemplative. She explained how it is to go to the first wedding after you own. I mean, our wedding was only 3.5 months ago. We’re still newlyweds. Having been through it so recently, you see weddings in a different light. You see the effort and the work that goes into it. You see every detail and appreciate it. As well, you also miss that exhilaration of planning and finally executing your own wedding. You can only hope that the bride and groom take the time to look around at their hard work and truly soak it in — because the next time they go to a wedding, they will soak it in.
When all was said and done, after we braved the casinos to get back to our room, we were happy. We both realized how happy we were for Natalie and Derek. Their wedding also confirmed our own commitment. Which was nice . . .
Then came a very sweet moment between the two of us. The couple in the room next to us where also guests of the wedding. We didn’t know them and we only knew they were at the wedding because we saw them go into the room. As we were watching TV, getting ready for bed, we heard them fighting . . . loud. She was screaming about how he treats her like a 3 year old and she was only joking and she was sick of “this fucking bullshit.” We heard it all. We turned down the TV to make sure nothing violent was going on . . . but it was just a screaming match. Well, she was screaming. He was pretty silent. He just told her to settle down. We decided we had listened long enough and turned the TV back up . . .
Then Megan turned to me and said with a smile, “I really do love you.” I turned and giggled out a, “Man, I sure love you too,” – just thankful that we work as a a married couple and as friends. Thanks Natalie and Derek for reminding us of our love and thanks crazy fighting couple of reminding us of our friendship.