© 2012 Timmy Tamisiea. All rights reserved. Shining-Apple-Logo-759135

109/365 – If An Apple Store Employee Claps In A Conference Room . . .

I love Apple computers.  I really really do.  I’m almost a fanatic.  Heck, my beautiful wife not only lets me buy comovcs and stupid art toys and veieo games, but for Christmas, she got me a subscripton to Macworld magazine.  Nerrrrrrrrd!  So, when I applied to be an Apple Store employee way back in October, I was super excited.  Don;t get me wrong, North Face has been great, but let’s get real.  If I was suited to sell anything in this world, it would be comics, video games or Apple products.  Then, a week ago, I got an invite to come to a group interview.  Hey, 4 months late’s better than never.

It's so cool how Steve Jobs hired a monkey to help him build his first computer.

Which brings me to today . . . Today I had that interview with the Apple store.  I’m not even sure I could commit to working there – wait, scratch that.  I’m sure I can’t commit to it.  Their whole screening process is very long.  It’s takes weeks.  By the time they said, “Timmy, you’re one Apple of a guy,” I’d be in LA working on my douche-bag skills.  My douche-bag skills aren’t very polished, so lets hope a an MTV marathon can get me back on track.

In any case, the whole interview was unlike anything I had been through.  They started the whole ting off with filing us into this conference room and clapping and cheering as we all entered.  Which, i have to say, was cool.  How many times does that happen in an interview.  My experience with conducting interviews lays with Pricoa Capital Group and that involved my bosses staring across a desk and writing down petty notes about the females they didn’t like because they were intimidated by another strong female.  This was more like a pep rally.

And we haven't even been hired yet.

 

We then did a typical NASC exercise – Nebraska Association of Student Councils – the volunteer organization I work with that teaches leadership skills to teens in Nebraska.  Yeah yeah yeah – save your jokes for the comments section . . . What we did was interview another applicant and then introduce them to the whole room.  I was pretty goo – goy a few laughs.  Not bad.  My partner did a fine job.  Pointed out what my friend Drew Korb makes fun of all the time: i own a Macbook Pro, a iPad 2, an iPhone 3GS (my IPhone 4 was stolen) and am a Macworld subscriber.  Someone corporate guy in the back (I almost called him a suit, but i don’t think Apple employees are allowed to wear suits – just jeans and black turtlenecks) – the guy in the back did an audible, “nice.”  So that was a point for Timmy.

All these guys stood in the back and kept saying "nice" in unison.

What was fun was pointing out the people who were trying really hard to think of big.  It’s funny how putting a bunch of people in a room and having them fight for a computer retail job gives them this obsession with sounding smart.  Come on guys, Apple is known for being user friendly – you can be user friendly too.

This is the computer equivalent of my ex-girlfriend - NOT user friendly.

Case in point.  They played a short film called their “brag reel.”  It was a video with interviews and images of Apple stores and their employees.  It was exactly what it was – a brag reel showcasing what Apple values in their retail sites.  When it was done, the leader of the interview asks, “What did you see?”  My first response was , “Are we 12?  What do we see?  Is this a find the hidden picture game?”  Well, a lot of the people saw a lot of things . . . “I saw the diversity in the atmosphere of clients and products that Apple strives to produce and promote.”  “I saw a family rich environment where its’ members found validation in the expressions of their peers.”

I opted out of this free gift in lieu of coffee.

 

Okay . . . .

Me, I said, “I saw really cool Apple stores I didn’t know existed.  The structures are cool.  That one in Taipei where it goes underground – that’s awesome.”  At least I was honest.

Honestly - the image of the old lady buying her first Apple just can't compete with this.

I tried really hard to be succinct and brief in my comments and answers.  But when it came to small group time, I may have flubbed that.  The group leader passed me an iPod touch that had a series of questions on it.  I had to read the first one, answer it and pass it on.  My question, “Tell us about a time when you had so much to do that it seemed impossible and how did you get past it.”  I just babbled and babbled and babbled about being an assistant director and a director on set.  I mean, what other atmosphere is there when everything need sto be done ina short amount of time and everything is against you?  Well, other than prom night.

Man, I must of sounded like an idiot.  In the end, though, the interview leader kept calling me “Timmy” in a real frivolous manner.  So maybe they did like me.  i don;t know.  All I know is this – I would be a much better salesman or teacher at an Apple Store than a North Face Store.  Period.  So, maybe things will work out and I can transfer to an LA store.

In unrelated news, I found a place to live while I’m in LA.  Yippee!

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