© 2012 Timmy Tamisiea. All rights reserved. 2

186/365 – Time Wasters!

As human beings, living in an era of video games, Facebook and Hulu, there’s more crap out there for us to waste our time on than ever before.  I was thinking about this because I finally started watching the first season of Game of Thrones.  And let me tell you . . . no, LET me.  It’ll be worth it . . . don’t let the title fool you — there are no “games” here.  These medieval sons of bitches had no time wasters.  They had to hunker down and get the shizzle done.  And like our those kids, our ancestors had less disposable time on their hands then we have ever had.  Still, we sit at our computers, wasting the time away on useless frivolity.

I said BEAT Mario, not EAT Mario!

In the time I have wasted on Doctor Who or Skyrim (I personally think this is just preparing me for the dragon horde that will envelop our great planet — see Reign of Fire), I could have finished another draft of my screenplay or learned more Photoshop skills or stopped the impending dragon horde.

Do not tell me this isn’t worth saving your life . . . Fine, battle them yourself, fatso.

When I look back at the last 10 years of my life, I can see a pattern.  A pattern of time wasters – certain go-tos that have become a staple of my dysfunctional sense of non-duty to my career and lifestyle.  Some of them you know, but I do have a few websites I’d like to share with you.  ones I seem to consistently go to . . . enough to bookmark them on my web browser . . . I thought it best not to fight these little morsels of time suck and project them onto you, my steady stable of 6 readers.  I won’t put them all on here (like Facebook) and I will save some for later posts (like Facebook) and I’m sure I’ll forget a few (like Facebook) but here’s 6 . . .


1) Superherohype


“Oohhhhh, big surprise, Timmy.  Thanks for the big insight into your psyche.”  Well, that;s where you can shove it.  Because most of you get your Superhero news from The Daily Planet of People because you think superheroes are “people”  Well, they’re not!  That’s right.  SUPER HEROES are SUPER!

Well, MOST superheroes.

This is a site first introduced to me by the great Steve O’Brien many moons ago.  If you want info on all the sci-fi, fantasy and comic book film news without Variety cluttering it up with news on some producer you don;t care about or their weird news speak, then this is your site.  Everyday they update it with great content, videos and news.  It’s also a much more pleasing site than it’s competitor, Ain’t It Cool News – a site that looks like it’s owner vomited the code onto its servers.  I think AICN may have more info, but it’s just an eyesore.  Anyway, most of the geek entertainment news you really want is right there on Superherohype.

2) Devour

Devour does not refer to some McDonald’s addict or some Hungry Hungry Hippos porn site.  Nope.  This is a site dedicated to videos . . . cool, crazy, fun videos.  Isn’t that right, Most Fascinating Man Alive?

I don’t watch much, but when I do, I DEVOUR it.

I only discovered this site a year ago when I bought my new iPad.  Basically, this site employs a bunch of coach potatoes to sit on the Internet and do what YouTube won’t . . . discern between stupid videos and good ones.  All the good ones show up here on a easy to read, pleasingly formatted site.  Most of the great videos I’ve shown you I have found on Devour.  So, skip the YouTube surfing and go straight here.  It’s worth it to not go through 500 cat videos to find the one that’s actually entertaining.

3) Uncrate

Again, not a site dedicated to moving.  It’s not a weird Union Storage website.  This is a site dedicated to consumerism.  Wonderful, manly consumerism . . . Isn’t that right, Most Fascinating Man Alive?

I don’t consume much, but when I do, I UNCRATE it.

See, dudes love gear.  They love stuff.  They also love it when they find unique stuff . . even if it’s way out of their budget.  You think I can afford all those xBox games . . . well, Welcome to Uncrate.  A website devoted to crazy shit you can own.  They have cars, food, weird grills, books — hell, I found this on their site . . .

Nuff said.

Everyday, these guys scour the net to find the weird, fantastic and odd things that you can buy.  And the put those rare treasures right there on their site.  And not all of it is over priced.  Much of it is with in all of our price ranges.   I plan on buying some Bloody Mary flavored peanuts very soon.

4) Dark Horizons

This is not a horror site or a site for soothsayers.  Instead, it’s much like Superherohype, but run by an Aussie and  filled with movie news for ALL genres.  I found this site back when I was surfing the net in NYC.  It;s thorough and free and could possibly replace a subscription to Variety.  I would highly suggest any cinephile bookmark this site ASAP.  You can watch trailers and get some very up to date news and articles on everything cinema.

5) The Oatmeal

There are a lot of cartoon sites out there.  Many of them are just reprints of the Sunday paper funnies.  As well, most of them are very biting or clever.  Sorry, Doonsberry.  You just don’t cut it anymore.  The Oatmeal is a fun site with hilarious and thought provoking comments on everything we hate . . . or love.  Written and drawn by Matthew Inman, it pretty much will make your day a little brighter with biting cartoon commentary on everything stupid that infiltrates that part of your brain that makes you ANNNNNGRY!  Like this gem on Twilight.  Or this snippet from his commentary on owning an Apple product:

But it also just has some really funny cartoons.  With it’d huge history of entries, you’ll have all day to waste!

6) Cracked

When I was a kid, I read Mad Magazine.  All the time.  i had a few Cracked magazines, but they just never compared to Mad.  Then I was introduced to Cracked.com.  This may be the funniest site I have ever been on.  A few years back, Cracked discovered that their readers loved lists.  Any kind of list was great . . . and everyone has copied that format.  Even your truly.  But if you want to go to the true purveyor of comedy lists, Cracked is where it’s at.  They also have videos and something they call Photoplasty – contests where they give a theme and readers submit photoshopped pictures.

My hope is that I will one day be able to write for these guys.  One day . . .

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