Category Archives: Uncategorized

That and I'm married.

346/365 – Palm Reading

Buying into weird myths and holistic mumbo jumbo really isn’t my thing.  I do think they’re entertaining and it’s fun to let your mind want to believe in them.  However, buying a bunch of crystals and making all decisions based on tarot card readings and […]

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345/365 – 9/11

Back on September 11, 2001, I got up in the morning and got ready for a day of memorizing.  I was playing Richard III in a Chicago production.  I was also unemployed, so I spent most of my days sneaking into the DePaul Library, commandeering […]

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344/365 – Almost Famous

So, I’m sitting in the 3rd floor kitchen in the Conan offices — also known as the monologue interns’ writers room — finishing up my second round of batches when a sketch writer comes in.   He looks around the room, a confused and slightly […]

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343/365 – What Do You Get When You Cross Patrick with an Asian Dude…

I would like to introduce you to  my new favorite hero.  He’s a mix between my brother Patrick and this funny fat dude I knew in high school but can’t remember his name . . . and George Costanza if he had moves. Ladies and […]

The real Bella Itkin.  This was probably how she looked at me when I was trying to organize her library.  "Silly American boy."

342/365 – Inventing Funny

For some reason, improv shows attract people who think their ticket is also a performer’s pass.  To them, improv means that they get to be a part of the show too!  Maybe, just MAYEB if they yell out whatever they want, they can be part […]

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341/365 – Conan’s Bruise

This past week I was lucky to have witness, live, an event that made all the internet buzz.  I could explain it, but video is really worth a thousand words.  I’ll just say, that as I was at the Conan rehearsal during this event, I […]

"I'm broke.  Get a paid internship."

340/365 – Pay It Forward

A lot of people are up in arms about the idea of internships.  The New York Times had article that basically compared internships to the modern day equivalent of indentured servitude.  At least indentured servants were promised something at the end of their tenure.  Interns have […]

Samantha!  I'm over here!  LOOK AT ME WHEN I"M TALKING TO YOU!

339/365 – 5 Fashion Trends That Need to Die

If there’s one thing I really enjoy about living and working in the comedy world is this complete lack of pretentiousness.  Others would say we comedians are just out of sync with the times and trends.  I’d say we are comfortable being ourselves, lacking the […]

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338/365 – I Have The Fortitude of a Fat Cat

I hope that got your attention.  If it didn’t, I have plenty more fake post titles I can subject you to.  See, this is one of those days I’ve hot nothing… just the fortitude of a dead cat.  That’s it.  Yes, the Democratic National Convention […]

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337/365 – Theme Music for the Deaf

Listen, I don’t expect television shows to have theme songs that blow your mind away . . . You know what, screw that.  Yes, I do.  With the third world problem solving budgets these studios have, I’m sure paying for the theme music wouldn’t take […]

Imagine if the Aztecs had been off by a few symbols.  2012 the movie would have been just another disaster movie . . . oh, it was just another disaster movie.

336/365 – Kill Me Now!

Things just seem to pile up when it comes to this blog.  Go back in time and you’ll find that there are some obvious days where I was just inundated with posts.  On those days, I’m behind and one or two of the posts gets […]

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335/365 – The Getty

In a town whose every inch is bathed in sunlight, we sure like to stay inside, Megan and I.  We could blame it on the heat, but come on, the heat ins;t teh culprit.  I think we’re just a little lazy.  And broke.  So going […]

What?  I heard about the sex scandal . . . Ohhhh, you want a sex scandal.

334/365 – Informed

Things are busy.  But good.  I’m becoming more informed than I ever have before.  Reading the news websites and getting acquainted with politics again is giving me a ken sense of the world’s status.  And it’s all for comedy.  It’s not a bad deal being […]

Here, step into my elevator.  I put on some Muzak while you wait.

333/365 – That “Oh Shit” Moment

It’s been really exciting knowing that I’ve kept my wedding promise to write one of these posts everyday for a year.  It’s much more exciting as I get to the final month of the blog.  Everyday, I’ve been getting these things written — whether or […]

Larry.  The real dream machine.

332/365 – The Dream Machine

Do you know what’s more embarrassing than playing 7th grade basketball in super tight 50’s shorts?  Having a step-dad attend the games and yell, “Timmy Dean, the basketball machine!” Yep, those were my young adult years; having my step dad yell different variations of the […]

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331/365 – Fear

I was asked what my biggest fear was a few weeks back.  It was for an improv class and I was unprepared for the question, so I just blurted out, “Bugs!”  Don’t get me wrong, bugs are nasty little shit heads.  I mean, that whole […]

Next time I'll just wear this to the commissary.

330/365 – Ellen

When I was in Chicago, good things were happening all the time.  It wasn’t as if I was some down on my luck bum, scooping up the shitty remains of success as I trudged my way to mediocrity.  But it did feel as if my […]

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329/365 – Hard at Work, Or Hardly Working?

Busy bee am I.  Just buzz buzz buzz.  Weeeee.  Just zipping around.  Getting things done.  Making the rounds.  Feeling the feel.  Pooping the chud.  Chewing the fat.  Creeping the FB.  Writing . . . Damn it, I’m busy. Today has been one of those rare […]

Dear God, he's still on how to bag your sandwich.  Can we please just eat now?

328/365 – Blah, Blah, Blah, Improv, Blah

The surest way to know if someone is not confident in their knowledge is if they over explain something.  Actually, it’s probably a better indicator of someone who is uncomfortable with their communication skills.  Somewhere inside these people lies a deep rooted fear that the […]

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328/365 – LA at Night

Thought this may, MAY be a day off.  Good try, Tamisiea.  Nope.  No day off for you.  So much writing.  So much work.  Between personal projects and professional (intern) I have a lot of shit to do.  So, blog, screw you.  My computer must be […]